No. This is so wrong. I am all for careful experimentation behind closed doors but a church is not an appropriate place for population boosting - not even an Episcopal church.
Thank you, Chris. And may I add that I am greatly impressed with Anglican Mainstream's unstinting commitment to practical research in the area of sexual perversion. Many of us would baulk at the idea of doing some of the things you condemn even for the furtherance of telling people what is right and what is wrong. Lisa, especially, is such an expert on fisting and shit games that I assume that she is busy with her research all the hours God sends her.
No wonder good, English prudes like myself are staying away from church. It was embarrassing enough when they started insisting we touched each other in the middle of mass. Copulation is a innovation too far as far as I'm concerned. I shall be writing to The Mail.
I am surprised there is any population in the pews to boost. Really, don't they teach headline writers on your side of the pond to think?
I do wonder if I was the only one to worry that pews would be uncomfortable? I do recall some interesting rumors about a pastor's daughter back in my Lutheran school days, but until now I always discounted them.
The important thing is that we make it as difficult as possible to obtain and use contraception. We support the religious liberty to screw in the pews without protection!
Only if it leads to the making of babies, Marcus. I think the fun bit must have been a mistake on the part of God or perhaps he didn't listen to the pope's instructions on the matter.
It wont ever happen with those hard pews. The local churches (whoever they are) will need to switch to those big recliners they have in gold class cinemas. And turn the lights out during the sermon.
The heterosexualist agenda . . . yet again!
ReplyDeleteGives a whole new meaning to the need for "churches to be open to new ideas" doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteWe find it helps boost attendances at Anglican Mainstream Gay Leper Conferences.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Chris. And may I add that I am greatly impressed with Anglican Mainstream's unstinting commitment to practical research in the area of sexual perversion. Many of us would baulk at the idea of doing some of the things you condemn even for the furtherance of telling people what is right and what is wrong. Lisa, especially, is such an expert on fisting and shit games that I assume that she is busy with her research all the hours God sends her.
ReplyDeleteNo wonder good, English prudes like myself are staying away from church. It was embarrassing enough when they started insisting we touched each other in the middle of mass. Copulation is a innovation too far as far as I'm concerned. I shall be writing to The Mail.
ReplyDeleteSorry I'm late in commenting. I was washing my right fist.
ReplyDeleteBut you're left handed.
ReplyDeleteOkay, you gutter-minded Brits. Couldn't it just mean that they want to put phone books on the pews, so that people can see a little better?
ReplyDelete(Not that I'm a typical repressed American or anything ....)
Mercy!
ReplyDeleteI am surprised there is any population in the pews to boost. Really, don't they teach headline writers on your side of the pond to think?
ReplyDeleteI do wonder if I was the only one to worry that pews would be uncomfortable? I do recall some interesting rumors about a pastor's daughter back in my Lutheran school days, but until now I always discounted them.
FWIW
jimB
Puts a whole new spin on 'go forth and multiply'!!!
ReplyDeleteCheers
Caro
The important thing is that we make it as difficult as possible to obtain and use contraception. We support the religious liberty to screw in the pews without protection!
ReplyDeleteOnly if it leads to the making of babies, Marcus. I think the fun bit must have been a mistake on the part of God or perhaps he didn't listen to the pope's instructions on the matter.
ReplyDeleteWell, to each their own, I say, but I don't have to watch.
ReplyDeleteMaybe this will convince my parish to pay for new pew cushions?
ReplyDeleteNo, Jendi, absolutely not. It would just encourage this nonsense.
ReplyDeleteI'm not kinky enough for this thread...
ReplyDeleteBut, JCF, you could actually help them "boost." Just close your eyes and think of Zena.
ReplyDeleteIt wont ever happen with those hard pews. The local churches (whoever they are) will need to switch to those big recliners they have in gold class cinemas. And turn the lights out during the sermon.
ReplyDelete